At first I thought I was next after my older sister died.
Then I realized I had just shifted into another zombie-like phase of my life.
Moments when I was alone and feeling daggers of mortality it hit me.
I wasn’t next.
At least not yet but I was on the clock and the ticking grew louder and louder even though my hearing has been regressing and regressing as I grow older and wiser.
And I’m not quite sure if I want to be wiser because when I’m just my own dumb self there’s a idiocy of glee that makes no sense, ignoring the cold hard facts that I’m destined for the cold hard ground for eternity
Eventually
But not now
And that in itself might be a death sentence.
